Recently we've seen a huge influx of superhero movies, ranging from the well known (Batman) to the previously not so famous (Green Lantern). Here's my take on what the universe would be like if Muslims decided to try their hands at being caped crusaders.
The Kaaro Knight- Although previously discussed in detail, no list would be complete without this famous crusader. Clad in black jubbahs, these men prowl the back saffs, praying on the not so innocent mischief makers with a swift vengeance. They truly believe that the rakkats are longest just before the witr. Whilst their identity remains a mystery, their presence is nontheless felt by all. Hated by many, feared by more, they're the hero every mosque needs, not the one it wants.
The Ridwaan: Narcissistic, these infidels are driven by an internal desire to both create unparalleled mischief and prove their superior intelligence to both the Kaaro Knights and the more supreme authority figure- the strict father. Whilst their influence is definitely felt, they're notoriously hard to catch. Many a hiding has been dealt out as tried and tested methods have failed, yet these kids have through many years of experimentation perfected the art of deception. Be it an audible cough or an extra loud takbeer every few rakaats to let their father think they're in the mosque, the missing topees of many a musalleeh are testament to their never ending mischief and deception.
Master Yodaseen: The old, wizened musalleeh in the first saff. Clad in his white semi see through kurta pants and brown jubbah with a high pitched wheeze to match and old, sturdy miswaak for support, these brothers are nontheless full of wisdom and advice for aspiring Knights. Frail as they may seem, come time for action and their joints are solid as ever. Strong within them, the Imaan is.
Raees Al Ghunain: Master and Commander of the League of Shahadah, this man is one to be feared. He believes in swift, merciless punishment and shall use his wooden stick on all who stand in his way. Together with his fellow Knights, they operate from the shadows, pulling ears and giving phone calls to fathers with an unstoppable ferocity.
The Incredible Hassad: Don't make me Mutakallim, you won't like me when I'm Mutakallim. By day an ordinary, passive and calm brother, these are the men driven mad by power. Give them imtihan, Istimah or gash duty and their Dawah stretches to eternity. From extra long bhayaans to passionate duas, once these men are placed in a position of authority, they take it upon themselves to single handedly visit every mans doorstep during supper time, usually emptying their tea supplies in the process.
Tahir: Once living a life of arrogance and shirk, this was the brother chased out of his home by his father, a great muazzin. Set to roam the land in search of a way to redeem himself, he stumbled across the power of faith and now sets upon far and distant lands delivering his speeches in a barely audible accent. Armed with his mighty Hammer length beard, definite effort and sacrifice is his motto- when he speaks after Maghrib, everyone listens.
Arbee Deenyath: The famous double edged sword. These are the uncles who pretend to befriend the boys at the back of the mosque, laughing, joking and playing whilst mentally making a note to speak to Moulana after Witr. Potentially the most dangerous of all, they choose to spend their ramadaan evenings not engaging in the Taraweeh, but monitoring and finding out who the trouble makers are in order to blackmail them later on.
Captain Ashaduallah: Previously weak of faith, this man strove for nothing other than to spread goodwill. However, he was told that his imaan was not enough. However, an injection of Hidayat changed that forever, he now fearlessly leads the congregation in prayer. Be it under the ramp at cricket matches or in a shopping mall jamaat khanna- this is the man who's in charge.
Lex Luthor- This is not nerely one man, but many an entity. Devoid of facial hair, he is the man who sets to make Muslim school childrens lives hell by forcing them to shave their beards. He's also managed to stumble upon our Kryptonite- who will marry my child? Seemingly unimportant to those uninvolved, he alone realises the true potential of expulsion. He unshamedly uses his resources that are codes of conducts and blatantly ignores trivialities such as constitutional rights. Bastard.
And of course, if Superman was Muslim- he'd be Hashim Amla (<---inspired by MJ Khan)
These are but a few examples of if Muslims were Superheroes- feel free to add any other suggestions.
Peace.
The Kaaro Knight- Although previously discussed in detail, no list would be complete without this famous crusader. Clad in black jubbahs, these men prowl the back saffs, praying on the not so innocent mischief makers with a swift vengeance. They truly believe that the rakkats are longest just before the witr. Whilst their identity remains a mystery, their presence is nontheless felt by all. Hated by many, feared by more, they're the hero every mosque needs, not the one it wants.
The Ridwaan: Narcissistic, these infidels are driven by an internal desire to both create unparalleled mischief and prove their superior intelligence to both the Kaaro Knights and the more supreme authority figure- the strict father. Whilst their influence is definitely felt, they're notoriously hard to catch. Many a hiding has been dealt out as tried and tested methods have failed, yet these kids have through many years of experimentation perfected the art of deception. Be it an audible cough or an extra loud takbeer every few rakaats to let their father think they're in the mosque, the missing topees of many a musalleeh are testament to their never ending mischief and deception.
Master Yodaseen: The old, wizened musalleeh in the first saff. Clad in his white semi see through kurta pants and brown jubbah with a high pitched wheeze to match and old, sturdy miswaak for support, these brothers are nontheless full of wisdom and advice for aspiring Knights. Frail as they may seem, come time for action and their joints are solid as ever. Strong within them, the Imaan is.
Raees Al Ghunain: Master and Commander of the League of Shahadah, this man is one to be feared. He believes in swift, merciless punishment and shall use his wooden stick on all who stand in his way. Together with his fellow Knights, they operate from the shadows, pulling ears and giving phone calls to fathers with an unstoppable ferocity.
The Incredible Hassad: Don't make me Mutakallim, you won't like me when I'm Mutakallim. By day an ordinary, passive and calm brother, these are the men driven mad by power. Give them imtihan, Istimah or gash duty and their Dawah stretches to eternity. From extra long bhayaans to passionate duas, once these men are placed in a position of authority, they take it upon themselves to single handedly visit every mans doorstep during supper time, usually emptying their tea supplies in the process.
Tahir: Once living a life of arrogance and shirk, this was the brother chased out of his home by his father, a great muazzin. Set to roam the land in search of a way to redeem himself, he stumbled across the power of faith and now sets upon far and distant lands delivering his speeches in a barely audible accent. Armed with his mighty Hammer length beard, definite effort and sacrifice is his motto- when he speaks after Maghrib, everyone listens.
Arbee Deenyath: The famous double edged sword. These are the uncles who pretend to befriend the boys at the back of the mosque, laughing, joking and playing whilst mentally making a note to speak to Moulana after Witr. Potentially the most dangerous of all, they choose to spend their ramadaan evenings not engaging in the Taraweeh, but monitoring and finding out who the trouble makers are in order to blackmail them later on.
Captain Ashaduallah: Previously weak of faith, this man strove for nothing other than to spread goodwill. However, he was told that his imaan was not enough. However, an injection of Hidayat changed that forever, he now fearlessly leads the congregation in prayer. Be it under the ramp at cricket matches or in a shopping mall jamaat khanna- this is the man who's in charge.
Lex Luthor- This is not nerely one man, but many an entity. Devoid of facial hair, he is the man who sets to make Muslim school childrens lives hell by forcing them to shave their beards. He's also managed to stumble upon our Kryptonite- who will marry my child? Seemingly unimportant to those uninvolved, he alone realises the true potential of expulsion. He unshamedly uses his resources that are codes of conducts and blatantly ignores trivialities such as constitutional rights. Bastard.
And of course, if Superman was Muslim- he'd be Hashim Amla (<---inspired by MJ Khan)
These are but a few examples of if Muslims were Superheroes- feel free to add any other suggestions.
Peace.
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